What A Girl Wants, by Kristin Billerbeck

The best thing about this book is that it's an easy read. So if you liked it, it was fun and light-hearted; and if you didn't, then at least you didn't waste too much time on it. Alas, I fall into the latter category.

I think I've heard this genre described as chick-lit. Chick-lite would be just as appropriate. It's very fluffy and insubstantial, with very little plot (the characters basically wander around Silicon Valley stressing out about jobs, apartments, and relationships), very little or very unbelievable character development, and very unremarkable writing.

It's supposed to be Christian, but the Christianity is very injected and afterthought-ish. Basically, it could have been written as a secular chick flick romance novel, with a few references to Jesus, church, testimony, and prayer penned in. The main character is very self-absorbed and shallow and does not have a Christian worldview: she's basically Bridget Jones, with an occasional obligatory prayer for help.

One of the most annoying features of the writing is the present tense. (For instance: This is so not good news, so I pick up my cell phone and dial my best friend, Brea. "I need a vacation," I announce.) This is trying to be edgy and clever, but just feels sloppy, the more so as the editor/author occasionally lapse and use a past tense verb, which comes out all the more jarring.

Another annoying thing is the oh-so-cutting-edge currency, or relevance, as if the author is sending you not-so-subtle smoke signals proclaiming, "I am cool! I am hip! I am very with-it, culturally speaking, and I know exactly what is going on in your world!" The incessant references to cool stuff (ti-vo, Manolos, Wild at Heart, palm pilots, American Idol) may prove the author's immersion in current pop culture, but will only succeed in making the book hopelessly outdated and so 2004 all that sooner.

Ugh. Okay. This is turning into an essay, and we want nothing so formal. Let me just add that the characters do not act like normal people and far too many things go unexplained. Why does pretty, intelligent, talented Mei Ling want to marry loser Dave? How is loser Dave going to support a wife if he's living with his parents, drives a bus, and smokes dope? Why does Ashley's namesake only come up at the very end of the book, and just like that, she and her mom suddenly bond after being tense all book? What's going to happen to Larry and doesn't Ashley even care about her appliances? Is Dianna really that one-dimensional? Why is John so annoying and why did Brea ever marry such a milksop?

Oh, and because the book's back cover promised us three men pursuing our dauntless heroine, the book must throw us an obligatory third man, but he just turns up for one lunch date during which it turns out he's been married twice and has kids from previous marriages, so there's no soul-wrenching angst over that angle. So it's not even well-written bad writing.

Why does this book annoy me so much? Even when I was single, I never acted like this. (I was never a patent attorney in Silicon Valley, either, though; nor was I one of five daughters in middle-class Regency England but I happily identify with Elizabeth Bennet.) I guess I don't want single girls reading this kind of stuff for inspiration. Ashley is just like you; single, confused, lonely, wanting to be content and wanting to please God; just dream on, kiss a few guys, keep praying and whining to your best friend and eventually everything will fall into place. The book doesn't give us any real moral, nor is the protagonist a heroine to emulate. It's just kind of...blah.

But, as I said, it's an easy read. And, to its credit, it kept me reading, if only to find out how the whole thing ended...although the ending felt so contrived.